(Editor’s note: Due the immense laziness of your humble narrator, I never posted the actual pics from week 13. Or, actually, I did, under the title “placeholder”. Just so you know this is all on the up and up, I’ve left that post here, along with Brian’s picks, which were sent to me in time to be posted, at least in theory. But since this sort of thing — the posting — ususally happens on Saturday afternoon, if things get too crazy, it sometimes slips through the cracks. But never fear, we DID pick the games, so here they are. My write-ups, however, were done much later, but the picks are the same)
Originally Post:
Yeah. Sorry.
So, we’ll go with:
Bears
Chargers
Seahawks
SaintsWe’ll cover why in a bit.
Write-up, posted January 5th, 2006:
| Vikings at Bears (-9) | |
|---|---|
|
Jeremy: Devin Hester is from the University of Miami. Is he really the same person as Roscoe Parrish? Or how about Jamie German? Or maybe Kevin Williams? Has anyone ever seen any of these people in the same room at the same time? I doubt it. Take the Bears. Pick: Bears |
Brian: The only people I know from Minnesota are Paul Jury and Kirby Puckett. In my head I envision girls from the Midwest to be dark beer guzzling, bratwurst eating, ignorant accent having tubs of lard. Plus the Vikings have purple jerseys; the only thing less masculine is Adrienne’s idea for a team with pink “outfits” called the Flamingos. It’s safe to say Minnesota sucks. Chicago has the EL Train. Me being from So Cal I give kudos to any city that has an effective mode of public transportation. Take the Bears. I’ll take the 405 and spend 49 minutes going 3 miles. Pick: Bears |
| Chargers at Bills (+6) | |
|
Jeremy: Did someone say Roscoe Parrish? Willis is from “tha’ U” as well, but that’s not going to be enough. Chargers in a rout. Pick: Chargers |
Brian: Either I’m geographically retarded or the city has left no real imprint, but I just had to Mapquest Buffalo to make sure it was actually in New York . New York is known for a great nightlife, good food, fashion and stars, but Buffalo? Not so much. Buffalo is probably considered as much of New York City as Temecula is considered San Diego. San Diego Plusses: Girls, weather, food, great downtown, beach and me. San Diego Negatives: All of the plusses. No one actually cares about football. Take the Chargers. Pick: Chargers |
| Seahawks at Broncos (-3.5) | |
|
Jeremy: The only thing I don’t like about pro football — other than John Madden — is that I don’t really root for anyone. People always ask me who “my team” is, and I say I really don’t have one. See, I used to root for the Broncos, and when I say that people assume I rooted for them when they were winning Super Bowls, and now don’t care. In fact, the reverse is true; I was a Broncos fan in the late 80s and early 90s when they were losing Super Bowls. When they started winning them, I lost interest. By all rights, I guess, I should be a Niners fan. But they were so good when I was growing up (the Montana, Rice, Young days) that even at a young age I couldn’t root for them in good conscience. The idiotic, self-entitled Niners fans didn’t help the situation any, although in the hierarchy of idiot fants, they’re not at the top. To whit: Top 5 Sports Fans Who Should Be Pushed Up Against a Wall And Shot
Given that 2 of the 5 are in SoCal, you can see why no one takes Los Angeles seriously as a sports city. Fuckin’ morons. The game? Oh, sorry. I guess I got going on a rant there. Take the Seahawks. Pick: Seahawks |
Brian: “That John Denver is full of shit”. 10 bucks to the first person to name that movie quote… Kobe Bryant raped a woman in Colorado. A bunch of school kids got shot. And CU is a bunch of earthy hippie stoners. The best thing out of Colorado is South Park. I love fish. I could seriously watch those dudes throw and catch whole fish for hours. Remember a few weeks ago when the Seahawks receivers tried to do it? Loved it. It looked liked they were trying to catch a used condom in between their thumbs (I’ve just always wanted to say that). I do hate the rain, but not as much as I hate benched Jake Plummer’s beard. Seahawks in a rout. Is it possible that Cutler plays so bad he gets benched for Plummer in the third quarter? I doubt it, but I’d love it. Pick: Seahawks |
| Niners at Saints (-7) | |
|
Jeremy: Maybe it’s just me, but does anyone care about Matt Leinart, Reggie Bush or LenDale White anymore? I mean, I live in USC central — no really, I bet there’s more USC alums around where I live in Los Angeles than anywhere else in the world — and no one gives a shit. Being a huge Miami fan, I always root for guys from the U. I want Devin Hester to do well. I want Frank Gore to do well. I would say I wanted Gino Torreta to do well, but that guy was a chump and we all knew it. I don’t know if I have a point, other than to say the Niners were so bad they let Ken Dorsey start a few games. And I hate to break it to you, ‘SC fans, but Dorsey was a better college QB than Leinart. Whatever. Take the Saints. And Reggie “Where is he now?” Bush. Pick: Saints |
Brian:I’d rather be gay than a hurricane victim. ‘Nough said. Take the Niners. Pick: Niners |
1 response so far ↓
Jeremy Abramson’s World of Jeremy Abramson » 2006 NFL Picks, Wild Card Round // Jan 5, 2007 at 11:13 pm
[...] Also, in case you missed it (which you obviously did), I’ve updated the picks for Week 13. Brian mailed his picks to me in time, and I put up a “placeholder” page with my picks, but I didn’t have time to do a writeup. But it’s there now, for your perusal (it’s worth the read, if only to see the Top 5 “need to be shot” sports team fans). [...]
Leave a Comment